Letters, August 19

Dear Landon and Ryan,
Thanks for taking the time to go out to lunch with me today. But really, thanks for talking it out honestly and understanding. It's a difficult thing to be brothers with all of you and also be your coach. It's a balance that I struggle with every year. I want to thank you for committing to work through this with the team. We will persevere. This season, and every season, is about finding our starting point and working from there. We know what we need to work on. Let's do it. Let's move forward with confidence, and play with control. Let's continue to get those mental hiccups out in honesty, and pray to move past them.

Dear Byeong,
Keep talking to me. I want to know what's going on in your head. First of all, because I care about you. Secondly, only then can we find a way forward. I'm so glad we had a chance to talk about the "Triangle" of a tennis match - the mental, strategical and technical parts that have to come together to win. But it was even better to hear of your frustration, because it means that you care too.

Dear Sherry Good,
Thanks for caring about the good of our tennis team. Thanks for being a place for them to talk. Thanks for being a mother to a young man who is living without his mother right now. I love working at Bethany because I know that no one will fall through the cracks without someone making an effort to connect.

Dear Northridge,
Sorry. We should have played. That's all. I'm sorry.

Dear God,
If I'm being honest, I'm already breaking down. I'm stressed at school, stressed with tennis, stressed about making calls whether or not to play matches - and now I'm sick. I'm giving this all to You. I'm going to try to breathe deeper and remember You are as close as my every breath. That is where joy is.