Team Camp 2019 - Devotional #3

Overview
We are enough. We are brothers. We are grateful.

We are accepted by God and each other.

That acceptance is what sustains us.

That sustenance allows us to find our significance.

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PAUSE:
- What is great about being accepted?

- Which person in your life do you feel accepts you the most?

- What is your relationship like with that person?

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Chasing Purpose

"The need for purpose is one the defining characteristics of human beings. Human beings crave purpose, and suffer serious psychological difficulties when we don’t have it. Purpose is a fundamental component of a fulfilling life." - Psychology Today

Humans seem to want significance - reason that they matter to the world. Sometimes we call it "meaning," sometimes we call it "purpose," and here I am calling this need "significance." We have a sense that what we do in our life matters, and we want to be going in the right direction.

Henri Nouwen, a famous Christian philosopher, came up with a brilliant triad that describes the ways that many people pursue significance and purpose. He called them the three lies of the human heart. We went into these in detail last year at camp, but they are so powerful, it's worth bringing them up again.

Three Lies:

1. I am what I do and accomplish.

2. I am what I have and accumulate.

3. I am what others say about me.

Within these lies, whichever we buy into, it is there that we often pursue our purpose or significance. If I believe that I am only what I accomplish, then I pursue a purpose of winning. If I believe that I am what I have and accumulate, then I pursue of purpose of consuming. If I believe that I am what others say about me, then I pursue a purpose of either people-pleasing or bickering with those who think differently than me.

I definitely struggle with the third of these lies, that I am what others say and think about me. It is easy for me to find my purpose in people-pleasing and keeping the peace at all costs. But when I do that, I end up feeling resentful because nobody really looks out for me, for the things that I want. I end up frustrated and feeling like this can't be all there is to my place in the world.

But working at significance as a response to these three lies is a way of working backwards. It's basing my significance and purpose on achievement, rather than on my acceptance. And so we want to look at this from the viewpoint of God's acceptance instead.

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PAUSE:
- Which of these three lies most affects you?

- In what ways do you chase acceptance based on what others think of you, what you have, or what you accomplish?

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What is significance?

When we try to rightly order our lives - receiving our acceptance from God and allowing that to sustain us - we still have a desire to be involved. To do something. But we should realize that our doing, our purpose, doesn't gain us any more acceptance. Rather than coming from a place of desperation and wild seeking, our purpose should come out of joy and gratitude. Another way of putting this is...

Our significance is what we do with our acceptance. 

Probably my favorite quote to explain this comes from Frederick Buechner, who says about significance comes "where our greatest joy meets the world's greatest need." 

You see, we are accepted, and that should cause great confidence and joy. In that confidence in joy, we can find some purpose by looking around us and seeing how the things that make us come alive are needed in the world around us. 

Here's my example: I love noticing the specific in the world. It gives me great pleasure to describe the way the wheat bends, to know the specific name for the helicopter seeds that fall from maple trees (samaras), and to be able to name for my wife the things she does that make me love her (like the way that she unwrapped a Burger King sandwich for me and handed it to me while I was driving over to Bethel College for a basketball game and we were in the middle of our biggest fight as an engaged couple - see, specifics :-)) 

Because of my love of specifics, I also love telling stories. Throughout my life I've done that through teaching, poetry, songwriting, this blog. These are my greatest joys - telling stories and filling them with specifics. When I have a class period at school where all the students are engaged with a story that I'm telling, I feel amazing. I feel satisfied. I feel at peace.

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PAUSE:
- What are your greatest joys?

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But my greatest joys can also cause me a lot of pain. Sometimes, I feel forced to write poetry. Recently, I have been trying to finish a poetry collection, and I have a certain number of poems I am trying to get to. Striving to just finish that next poem is giving me no peace and joy. It is stressful. 

That's because intention matters when thinking about purpose. Direction matters. If I am trying to gain acceptance by plunking out another poem or telling you a funny story, then I will not be at peace.

If I am resting in GOD'S ACCEPTANCE, and writing poems in gratitude or in response to human need, then I feel that peace. If I am using my love of specifics to send you an encouraging email, or write your senior night speech, then I feel at peace. 

Our purpose, our significance, comes with what we do with our acceptance. 

Living That Out with the Team

So, on this team, you are secure in the acceptance of God and the acceptance of your brothers.

On this team, you have that foundation.

So, what is your greatest joy in being a teammate? Perhaps your greatest joy is howling with joy when someone hits a great shot, just joining in their affirmation. Perhaps your greatest joy within the tennis team is helping someone fix a shot. Perhaps your greatest joy is working really hard when you can tell others are not. Perhaps your greatest joy is researching tennis, really figuring things out. Perhaps your greatest joy is recognizing the work of others and thanking them for what they do. 

But, like a great game of Team 105, all of those things are necessary to a great team. We need people to hit the overheads, but we need people to make sure to run down and get a racket on the smashes too. We need people to be vocal leaders of encouragement, and we need people to silently work hard. We need people to research, we need people who teach, we need people who make others laugh, we need people who make people think. 

I can't be all those things... I just tell stories and try to describe the specifics, like trying to come up with a poem for the stench of our room here at camp. An odd mix of sweaty athletic socks, Fruit by the Foot, and dry Frosted Flakes. Yeah, something like that.

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PAUSE:
- Where do you find you have the greatest joy within the team?

- Are you trying desperately to gain acceptance with the way that you act and serve the team, or are you receiving the acceptance of God and others and contributing out of gratitude?

- What action could help you receive and remember God's acceptance more?

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